the big boys

the big boys, originally uploaded by laniee75.

Becki and I took our boys out to Grand Haven for the day. It was a cloudy day but it was also perfect. It was warm enough to be comfortable but the sun wasn't beating down on the sand to make it too hot to walk on.

Ben & Noah had never even set eyes on Lake Michigan before and it was fun to see their reaction. The water was a bit cold for me and Noah but Ben & Alex had a great time swimming and playing in the waves.

I was always afraid to take my boys to the beach because I'm terrified of them getting sucked into the undertow. But they did fine and I am all ready to try again. I wanted to go today but I don't know that Mike is ready for it with his boot. I'll keep working on him.

Noah let Mike pull his tooth last night. The tooth fairy must have come fairly early because around 1:45am I heard someone coming out of the boys room. I figured it was Ben or Noah going to the bathroom but then I heard someone in the kitchen. I knew it was one of them getting into something but I was too tired to get up and check. This morning Ben came in our room all excited because his tooth had come out "at 1:45am". He was in the kitchen getting a baggy for his tooth. But the tooth fairy had already come for Noah's tooth. Now Ben wants to wait until Nicole is home so he can show her. :)

Oh, yeah. I had my eye appointment and I'm still legally blind in my right eye. And now I also have a cataract. I'm not worried about that. The eye is pretty much useless to me so I'm just going to concentrate on keeping my other eye healthy. The IOP was a bit high in my "good" eye so I may go have it rechecked. My mom has glaucoma and I have heard it can be hereditary. So I'm going to keep on top of it.

Tractor boy

Tractor boy, originally uploaded by laniee75.

We're still here. Enjoying summer.
We were at my dad & Karen's for 4 days (although not 4 days straight). Noah found my little brother's old pedal tractor and he is in love. He washed it a few times and he pedals it all over the long driveway.

Tonight I am going to the eye doctor. I need a new supply of contacts for my one good eye since I have made a 3 month supply last 2-1/2 years. (I have to admit I don't follow instructions). Then I'm going to come home and work on the boys' closet some more. I'm hoping to have shelves built VERY SOON so we can have a bit more organization in there. Mike has his cast off and is off of his crutches so I think he should jump right into some projects!

he WANTED it!

he WANTED it!
Originally uploaded by laniee75

Typical car behavior.

Koolaid mohawk

Koolaid mohawk, originally uploaded by laniee75.

Noah's new hair.

I just pulled his first loose tooth. He was terribly excited. Now he's putting it in a baggy to put under his pillow. :)

Jumper

Jumper, originally uploaded by laniee75.

I really do love Summer. I'm not a huge fan of the humidity but I love the freedom and doing things with my kids. I haven't seen Nicole in over a week and won't until the 27th. I miss her.

Father's Day was pretty uneventful. I went to church and then went home to get the boys ready to head over to my dad & Karen's for swimming. Mike stayed home. We (the boys, Kimmy & I) played in the pool for a few hours. My dad wasn't even home until about 6:00. And then when he was home he was busy trying to fix the A/C and their well. So I guess it wasn't really a father-oriented day.

Tomorrow I have to go to the dentist because my tooth broke or a filling fell out. I'm just really hoping it's not going to turn into another crown because we can't afford it. I used to have such nice strong teeth. Then I had kids. I think they leeched out the strength for themselves when I was pregnant.

We really don't have any big plans for most of the week. I like it that way. :)

, originally uploaded by laniee75.

This photo just makes me happy.

We are having a busy busy summer vacation so far. Last week was VBS every night and this week is a different thing called Kids Games (a bible based program with an emphasis on different sports & games - Noah picked "Drawing Animals" and Ben picked Soccer). They are gone from 9am until 12:30 pm and then we spend the rest of the day having fun. Yesterday we bought new shoes for the boys, played at the park and had a picnic and finished the day with the movie UP (actually just Noah and I went to the movie because Ben didn't want to). Today we went out to my dad & Karen's to swim and visit. Tomorrow we will have a fun afternoon at the Plasma donation place since I haven't been there since before Disney and I need to start earning money to PAY for Disney.

Nicole is gone until the 27th and I miss her. We had actually been getting along pretty well so it's hard not having her around to talk to.

Mike's doing ok. He's sick of being on crutches and not being able to do what he wants. He is back to work this week and will get a cast on Thursday. I hope he gets blue but if he gets white I will probably paint it while he sleeps... >:o) I can't believe he isn't excited to have a cast! I've always wanted one and I never break anything. Although last weekend I thought for sure I was going to break my foot when I fell off of the curb in front of Gander Mountain. Fortunately my bones are still strong and they could handle it. If I'm going to break a bone I prefer it to be one I don't need so much. Like maybe my left arm.

Not much else is going on but I do want to say CONGRATULATIONS to Judy on her new grandson who was born yesterday evening! Yay! Go check out Judy's blog if you haven't already - she's over on my sidebar - it's called "Anybody Home". She's hilarious. And she lives about 3 miles from me and we've NEVER met in person. That's hard to believe since I tied with her husband on the "How well do you know Judy" quiz on Facebook. :)

Things change

Mike & Noah, originally uploaded by laniee75.

This photo is one of my favorites of Mike. I probably already put it up on this blog somewhere but I like it so much that I don't care. I love Noah's dirty little face and his new mohawk and the way he has his little arms around his daddy's neck. And I love the look on Mike's face because it's the face he makes a lot when the kids are having fun with him. If you know Mike you know he's not a really smiley person and he's also not one to talk about feelings or talk much at all. It just makes my heart melt when he and my kids share little moments like this because they are somewhat rare. My kids can bring things out of him that I never could.

Oh yeah, change. That's what I wanted to write about. I've had a busy week with school, Mike's foot surgery, out-of-school things like graduations and trips. Today is the first day I have any time to just sit and not have to worry about what needs to be done (well, that's not exactly true because we do have the orthodontist at 4:00 and VBS at 6:30). So I'm sitting here on the computer, checking email, facebook, flickr to see what my friends are up to. And then I realized, I haven't seen or talked to my best friend since BEFORE we left for Disney. Things haven't been the same with us since...gosh, I can't even remember when it was but it's been months. We used to talk almost every day. I miss her. But I don't know how to make things go back to how they were. I don't know if it's possible which is a change because we have NEVER had a time where we couldn't just start up where we left off and have the same friendship we always had. It's hard to take that step and reach out now because I feel guilty. I feel as if I've abandoned her even if it was because I had to step back for a while. I don't know what I should do. I love her dearly, I always will. But something has changed and part of me is ok with it. And that just starts up the feelings of guilt again.

Another change is the way things are going at home. I'm used to taking the kids and doing what ever we want over the summer. We normally spend a lot of time at my mom's or my dad's swimming, playing outside, "camping" or just whatever we want. Now I have Mike who can't make his own meals (well, he can make them but he can't relocate them on crutches) so I have to be here. It's not forever and I am trying SO hard to be a good wife and understand that this is what a wife does. But I feel resentful because all of a sudden our summer is limited to things that allow us to be close by so he's not alone and starving. I don't want to be this way. And I just keep telling myself that it's only one summer. And it's probably not as bad as I think. We could spend the night somewhere and he'd just have to find a way to make it work but then I worry that he's going to feel neglected. I'm just NOT a nurturing person when it comes to my husband. And he's not when it comes to me. It's just the way we are. It's the way we've always been. I remember one time I was violently ill (I won't get into details but let me just say it was one of those times you just didn't know which end to "cover" first) all night and when I told him I was staying home from work he basically told me I needed to go to work because I wasn't "that sick". And, stupid me, I listened and somehow made it to work only to be told by my boss that I better get home because I didn't look well. That's just Mike. He is the one who probably would have told me to "toughen up" while pushing his sons into the world if I hadn't threatened him first. So when he has a broken foot, is pretty much taking up my entire living room and TV and can't even get his own drink, yeah...I am tempted to tell him to "toughen up".

Mike's surgery went well. He has a screw in his 5th metatarsal and is in a splint (half cast) for 2 weeks and then he should get a short cast. He won't be able to put any weight on his foot for at least 4 weeks. His doctor is awfully cute. I told Mike I may break my foot.
He also got tiny cookies after his surgery and tried to slow his heartrate like a ninja. I have it all on video. He doesn't remember most of it.

Well, I'm off to read a book. The kids are watching Star Wars and Mike's using MY tv so I'll just go read some more.